My 40th birthday's present wish list

My birthday is in two weeks. It’s not every day one turns forty or, as I like to call it, 37 for the fourth time. So I’d like to celebrate in style. Below is my wish list for that day:

1.       At least 8 hours of continued, uninterrupted sleep. If I can lay sprawled all over my queen-size bed, the better.

2.       A 30-hour day, so I can watch all 8 Harry Potter movies, one after the other, and still get present #1.

3.       Breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner, second dinner, and late night snack in bed.

4.       The ability to eat all I want that day without gaining a single ounce. In fact, I could benefit from losing a pound or twenty.

5.       Going to the movies again, for the first time in like 18 months. I wonder which movies are coming out this month. Wait, there’s a new Jurassic World?

6.       An A in all my school assignments due that week, because c’mon, it’s just the decent thing to do.

7.       A new Fossil watch, a stunning diamond bracelet, and the latest iPhone. An accompanying smart phone for my toddler, so he doesn’t destroy mine… again.

My Top 5 First Mother's Day List

1.    I was invited to attend a corporate brunch for mothers. I had zero expectations as they were giving away prizes. But when they announced the “Mother of the Year,” I was shocked when they called my number. I couldn’t believe my luck had finally changed. I mean, I NEVER win anything. When I opened the gift, though, I realized my luck still sucked: I “won” a set of kitchen utensils.

2.    As a special treat for mom, our ward Mother’s day celebration included a whole 30 minutes of mariachis singing songs I have never heard of. I don’t particularly favor mariachis, either.

3.    I was one of “those” moms who wore a homemade brooch during all of the Sunday meetings. Thank you, Young Women.

4.    My husband prepared three delicious meals for me during the day. That was no different from any other day, since he always does the cooking.

5.    On the positive side, my husband spent about three hours making me a presentation/video about my top motherhood moments, I got to spend the afternoon with my mom, and my son kept asking for my arms all day. I finally understand what all the fuzz about this celebration is about.

Merry Christmas!

Although I wish the NBA hadn't started its 2011-2012 season today, I'm glad Christmas Day this year is a Sunday.  That, and the fact that I'm broke, so there were no gifts to go around, made me remember what exactly it is that the world celebrates today: the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ.  Let us all remember:

Why December is so awesome

1. Except for last Friday (which wasn't that bad, really), it has rained every day, and the temperature is not high enough to make me consider suicide, or to sob non-stop.

2. Because of #1, I have been able to run in the rain a couple of times (it just doesn't stop raining all day).  It makes me feel like I'm in a musical or, at least, an episode of Glee with Gwyneth Paltrow.

3. Classes have ended, and I don't have to pull out my hair every day wondering how to make French interesting to a handful of hormonal teenagers.

4. People on the street are nicer ("I won't mug you today; my Christmas gift to you").

5. So many dinners and social events going on, I have already broken my healthy eating diet three times, and Christmas is still a week away.

6. Church starts an hour later on Christmas and New Year's Day.  Note: This does not necessarily imply an extra hour of sleep, but it does mean I can go to bed one hour later, with no remorse.

7. Even though I keep telling people I'm broke and I won't be giving away any presents this year (other than my unconditional love), I keep getting cute presents.  Don't say I didn't warn you.

Today I was reminded of a John Grisham's book

Can you imagine my excitement when I got this email this morning?

"This proposed settlement ("Settlement") is on behalf of a nationwide class of consumers (the "Class") who (1) purchased tickets on Ticketmaster's website, www.ticketmaster.com ("the Website") between October 21, 1999 and October 19, 2011 (the "Class Period"), (2) paid money to Defendant Ticketmaster for an Order Processing Fee ("OPF") that was not refunded, (3) did not and do not opt-out of the Class, and (4) were residents of one of the fifty United States at the time of their purchase".


At this point, I was angered I didn't buy more ticket shows through Ticketmaster.  What was I thinking, trying to get a discount for locals or students for quite expensive Vegas shows? I should have gone the traditional way, and use Ticketmaster at all times.  But then I read my "Summary of your legal rights and options":


"If you take no action (of course I will take no action), and the settlement is approved by the Court (I will be praying for that), you will automatically receive, via email at the most recent email address associated with your purchases on Ticketmaster.com, discount codes ("Codes") which can be used for future purchases for U.S. events (I'm getting credit?! C'mon, it can't get worse than this) from Ticketmaster's Website (except for events at venues owned or operated by AEG as set forth in the Settlement Agreement). For each transaction that you made during the Class Period, you will receive one code via email for a $1.50 discount (wow, what a fortune!), up to a maximum of 17 codes (I'm glad I only made 4 transactions with you, I wouldn't want all that money to go to my head)... The Codes may be combined up to a maximum of two credits ($3.00) that may be applied on future transactions as described above (seriously, Ticketmaster, what a great deal!).

New Directions?

I decided to start sharing some of my adventures in the love arena. As I started writing, I realized I have to let go of many inhibitions to do so. I am by nature a very private person, so I'll still keep stuff to myself, and I'll change names and circumstances when the privacy of other people needs to be respected.

Sadly, I think I need at least one more week to mull over the details before I start writing.

PS: If you feel like commenting on my blog, do so under your own name. There's nothing more pathetic than a rude (and inaccurate) comment under "Anonymous." Have some courage!

My Christmas wishlist

1. Everybody calling me doctor without me having to go through 5 more years of grad school. Haven't I done enough to deserve one of those honorary doctoral degrees they give to famous old people? I'll soon be old enough, it seems, and all my years of struggling with teenagers at Church, or teaching English to seriously learning-deficient people? C'mon, those ought to give me some credit hours.
2. A job where I can finally do what I love all day, like head karaoke singer.
3. A world where I could eat all the fried stuff with cheese I want, and not put on one single ounce of weight, or worry about my cholesterol level, diabetes risk or cancer threats. Millennium, maybe?
4. The final disappearance of stupid TV shows, like the Real Housewives and Jersey Shore.
5. A cute, smart guy asking me out with no stupid issues on the side. For references on what I mean, please see this 2-month old post.
6. All seasons of 'Lost' on DVD. Add to that, if you have the means, 'Alias', 'Doctor Who', and '24' (from what I hear, I still haven't watched it).
7. A Kindle. I'm humble enough, so I only need the cheapest one. I just want to be able to read my 600 ebooks on the go.
8. The new U2 Ipad. This applies to my (healthy) obsession with U2, and provides me with a lighter carrying option than my current 17-inch 5-pound laptop.
9. World peace.

Why the lists?

1. Even though my thoughts are a veritable mayhem, bullets and numbers give it a more organized look.
2. I'm an engineer. My brain has been professionally trained to think in numbers.
3. I can prioritize ideas.
4. I just realized this post is plain dumb. So I'll bow out with what little dignity I got left, and call it a night.

How can you tell you don't have a life

1. You have read 4 books in 5 days.
2. You have watched 3 looong movies and an entire season of your favorite sitcom in the same period of time.
3. Your mattress is now shaped exactly to your back.
4. Your idea of a wild Friday night is turning off the lights and listening to music on your iPhone.
5. You forgot what the ringtone in your phone sounds like.
6. You start referring to Netflix, Hulu, Twitter, and Facebook as your "best friends"
7. You squint your eyes when you step past the main entrance to your place.
8. You have personal cute names for your laptop, your bed, your TV...and the fridge.

What I'm really doing while I tell people I'm busy

1. Secretly planning my wedding.
2. Facebook stalking this cute guy I met at Church today.
3. Watching all seasons of Dancing with the Stars, The Biggest Loser, and The Office on Hulu.
4. Planning a global boycott of Netflix.
5. Blogging.
6. Playing solitaire on my iPhone.
7. Playing 'where the crap did you put my stuff?' with my baby niece.
8. Daydreaming.
9. Not playing Farmville, CityVille, Mafia Wars or anything related, I still have a life.
10. Updating my list of mortal enemies.